So I am two weeks in to my 16 weeks of student teaching.
I was a bit worried about the teacher I was placed with but as time progresses and I learn more about her, I really like her, we have a lot in common.
I am jumping between the two PreK classrooms and I love both of them. It's crazy how different students create a different energy in the room and a different classroom dynamic. I get to see two different ways of managing classrooms, and while there are similarities the differences amaze me. I love one classroom, they are super organized and the students know what is expected of them, there is rarely a huge outburst of misbehavior, this one really fits my personality. The other classroom is challenging, I feel like if the students had a bit more organization and set routines that they would do just fine but without them the students LOVE to push the limits. There are more "problem" children in the challenging classroom and I know that plays a huge role in being able to manage the classroom.
I love this age, it surprises me because I always thought that I would want to teach older kids (1 or 2) but I enjoy the atmosphere and their excitement for learning and life! Some of these kids have already run away with my heart and some of them scare me! I feel like I'm finally creating trust with some of the boys and this will help them be able to accept me as an authority figure more so than they do now. There are a few girls that are just the best, they are sweet and make me laugh. One girl I would love to take home with me, everyone loves her, she's very mature and just so adorable. There is a little boy that knows tons about rocks, that's a pretty cool thing to know about, he found a really pretty one and gave it to me. There's another boy that knows crazy things about dinosaurs, he's one of the young ones so his knowledge blows my mind. It's so cool to learn about them and spend time with them.
There have been challenges, it's so hard to know what is expected of you. Part of the past two weeks I had to use to learn about the classroom and see how things are done but sometimes when you are observing you feel like you aren't doing something you should be. When I am asked to do something I do it right away and to the best of my ability but it's nearly impossible to just jump in and do something when you don't know how to do it and haven't had it explained to you. You have to learn what each child responds to when being disciplined and remember to do that the next time but sometimes I just have to have help to deal with the situation. I have had to fight with the stupidest copiers ever invented, I mean if I want to make a copy bigger and have already selected a paper size shouldn't I just be able to push a button that says "fit to page"? But that would make too much sense and be too easy! Then my teacher got in trouble for allowing me to leave at a certain time, the principal then wants to have a meeting with the two of us. It was the dumbest meeting ever, Friday of my second week there and we are going to go over the basics of what the University expects of me during student teaching. Really? Shouldn't we have done that like day one or two?? Then he sits there and repeats like three times that most people who study education in school only last a maximum of 3 years teaching. Why in the hell would you say this to a student teacher?? This is basically saying "You are going to fail but you better give me 110% while you're here." And he kept saying "this time of student teaching is to help you decide if this is what you want to do." Why would anyone go through 3 and 1/2 (4 and 1/2 in my case) years of schooling just to spend the last semester of school "deciding if it's for you"? I have been in 8 different classrooms in 4 different settings, I think I should damn well know by now if this is for me. The meeting was so frustrating and when we were done the kids were still napping so I had another hour to sit in the quiet and stew over what was said while I was cutting out things I laminated. I came to the conclusion that I really just hope he was having a bad day and that's why he said what he did, if that's how he treats all student teachers then I wonder how many of them ask to be placed somewhere else or drop out of college. I PRAY that for the next 6 weeks I don't have to deal with him and I can just deal with my teacher, the other PreK teacher and the teacher aids. These women are amazing and only want me to succeed, those are the people I need to be around!
Having to do homework while being in the classroom is just annoying. I want to be able to put at least 90% of my focus in the classroom but because of the other expectations for this course I can only put about 70ish% of my focus in the classroom. But I will deal with it and do the best I can so I can get that diploma by the end of June!
There will only be more challenges to come but they will just make me a stronger person and a better teacher. I have to find out how I get approval to take 3 days off for graduation in 3 1/2 weeks. I have to once again make sure that my amount of time in the classroom is sufficient and I won't have to make up time in August (because there is no time at the end of my courses since it lines up with the end of the school year in our school district and because that would suck like no other). Whatever happens I will make it work and trust that it's all going to happen as it is meant to.
So day off tomorrow and back at it on Tuesday with more responsibilities.
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